Women Of Destiny

And so the end of our match with NYJC marks the end of our "A" Div tournament.

A week before the match on Monday, my ankle was still swollen, but i am determined to play. This time i really want to play. I really wouldnt want to regret that i did not give my best for this match years after when i look back.

So in the hope that my ankle would heal miraculously by Monday, i started praying and even fasting so that, you know, God would heal it. Because he is the only one capable of doing that. I really believe that i could actually get up to play on Monday.

But not everything happened as i had hoped.

On Sunday, i messaged my coach and asked him what i could do about my ankle, as it was feeling really "loose", like any sudden jerk would detach my ankle bone from my feet. "Nothing." was his prompt reply. He went on to say that its not worth it to risk worsening the injury for such a match.

!!!!!

I asked further what he meant and that i only want to prepare myself even if i ended up warming the bench. He said he wouldnt put a player who is less than 90% fit to play. At that moment, i felt like someone had slapped me in the face, like the hint wasnt clear enough already! Annoyed and very upset i was.

On monday, i still brought along my bball shoes. Maybe, there might still be some chance..

It turned out that i get to sit and watch my team mates play for the whole thing. I watched them lost. Throughout the game, i kept glancing at my coach's direction, hoping that he would look my way and get me in. But no. As the game turned into the 4th quarter, i was practically DYING to play.

And it was like that, the timer went into the last second, we proceed to shake our hands with the other very happy team, thanked the coach and the referee, and went out the stadium for our debrief.

Actually, there really was nothing much to say. We had lost. The last match is over. And from that day onwards, we need not go for training anymore. Truth be told, i felt quite pai seh for him. He had been coaching us for a year plus plus and there's not much of a victory from the team. A bunch of losers, huh? The team knew well that many people in school are mocking us behind our back, look down on us, and always very eager to find out how much we lose or how great is the score difference after each match we played.

Needless to say, i was bombarded by my classmates with questions about the results the minute i stepped into class the following day. WHAT'S THEIR PROBLEM?!

Oh, we took some pictures in the stadium's toilet that day too. NAH, we would never stay sad for long =)

I'm no.9! ^.^

Signing off,
Jo

Had a pretty tiring week so far.

Ever since my injury on Monday, i've been limping painfully every where i go.

Being someone who wants everything to be fast and efficient, i get really frustrated with myself when i find myself overtaken by practically everyone and not getting to places as fast as i used to.

Also, having been to the sinseh, i knew how serious my injury is and that i really should not put too much pressure on it. BUT I'M REALLY REALLY ANXIOUS FOR IT TO HEAL IN 2 WEEKS TIME, just in time for my 3rd match. (I missed the 2nd one, and no way am i going to miss the 3rd one.) And i simply cant stand my snail pace. Oh, took this picture while i was watching the match i couldnt play, though i very much wanted to =( -->>>>>

And yes, i understand how sometimes when a person hurt him/herself, people will naturally be showering more care and concern for him/her. But maybe im just not a big fan of having special attention. Its not as if i'm paralysed! *Touchwood*

This friend of mine, lets call her A, said she wanted to go home with me. Another friend, B, was with me as we are heading the same direction. When i asked A why she would want to go home with me because its just not very convenient for her to do so, A replied, "Because of your ankle la."

Now at this moment, instead of feeling the kind of fuzzy feeling and touched from her reply, i felt angry instead. For goodness sake, i didnt even ask her to do that and she's sounding like she's so obliged to do it. I told her, with a hint of frustration, "No need la, who ask you to do that, seriously you can just go home."

After that, B told me i was being very ingrateful. But to me, i just felt...i dont need the sympathy that i thought A was "radiating". I just dont need the special attention can!?

I was so so annoyed and irritated that i uttered a dirty word under my breathe, which unfortunately, B heard it.

Suddenly, i really wanted the pain OUT of my ankle, i want to walk without the awful limping and climb the stairs without feeling breathless, and STOP sitting out for trainings. I just dont feel like waiting...

It was then, while i was doing some reflection of my own, that i felt really guilty, for shooting down my kind and thoughtful friend and for saying that dirty word. I think God wants me to learn something out of it. And im going to wait and see what He wants to tell me. And i really pray hard that some big big miracle could happen so that my ankle could twist back and be as good as new again.

Signing off,
Jo

The time was 5pm, and we were on board a bus back to school from the SBC ( Singapore basketball centre).

The whole bus was silent. I was sitting alone right up at the first seat, practically sobbing my eyes off. In fact, judging from the total silence, i dont think i'm the only one doing that.

The boys from the bball team were being very sensible, there's hardly any sound from them.


Our match with MI had ended.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

I couldnt sleep the previous night! This match is so important to us, if we were to win this one and the next one, we could get to the second round.

All of us were excused from lessons at 11 (YEA!) since the bus was due to arrive at 11.30. Apparently, everyone was nervous. I tried to boost their confidence by asking, "So where are we going to celebrate after this?" See? I was so sure we were going to win, because we just HAVE to win.



We arrived the place at around 12 plus, and watched the guys play. Boys basketball matches are always more exciting than the Girls. Pace of the game is much faster plus more stunts etc.



Then we went to change into our jerseys =) It was too revealing for me (the side of my sports bra is just...exposed!!), but i couldnt do much about it.



First, 2nd and 3rd quarter of the game, we were leading, not by alot though.
Then we went into the last quarter, dont know what went wrong but they started catching up, still not very enough to lead us, but we made more mistakes too.. Finally, the time stopped. The score was 18-18. Tied.

So the game was extended for 5 more minutes. 3 mins into the game, which was already very crucial and everyone was so tensed up we fumbled with the ball, dribbled and let the ball slipped off and such, I twisted my ankle and fall down. I tried to get up but couldnt. Team-mates came and surrounded me, and this is the part i so dislike. But nvm. Fast forward >>>>>

The last second ticked by, and we lost by 3 points. I was sitting on the bench and staring at that huge timer opposite the court. 00:00. End.

Seeing how hard everyone had given their best, it was difficult to keep myself from bursting into tears. We went and shaked hands with the other team and walked back to the bus.

I noticed the uneasy silence as soon as i got on the bus. As the pain was getting more intense, i just took the first seat, and buried my face in my towel.

It was the longest bus ride of my life. *so drama*


But after that i found out that the bus uncle actually took the wrong route so... yea.




Signing off,
Jo

(Knowing me, you are almost right that what probably ensues will mostly be about bball, bball etc. I apologised if it gets boring for you :-) )
I was walking in to school this morning when my bball mate came up to me and we talked. She told me that one of us received news that she will not make the final team.

Me: Huh? Why so sudden?

She: Dont know la, but she cried a little bit..

Me: Oh dear... *thinking*

(Pause)

My at that moment's train of thoughts : Poor girl, why cry....... Now, its 1 out....... 1 never attend trainings....... so 12 peeps left, so........

As if i have only just woken up, realisation took quite long to finally dawn on me.

Me: HUH?! Means we got in?

She: *nodded*


Its like... I dont know how to react to this, but i can only say, i'm not happy about it.

I feel i do deserve some good slapping. I asked God to help me, regretted mine asking him almost immediately, and then, ta-daa! He answered my prayer.

Hmmm, honestly, I dont know what i want. I felt i really needed those training time to revise my work and to reduce the piling stacks of assignments and tutorials. Well well..

Going off to reduce them now =)

Signing off,
Jo

First match up against Millenia Institute, coming Monday. *Sighhhhhhhhh*

After so long, here i am. Just got home from dinner. Its the FIRST time in so many many many years that my father brought us out to eat! I thought my mum was joking with me when she told me this after i got home from church. I hope he will bring us out often. Our family just dont have those kind of family day or family time etc. No display of affection for one another or greetings of birthday wishes or celebration of special occasions. We just dont have this culture.
Anyway...

I haven been blogging for a pretty long time not because nothing special or blog-worthy has yet to happen to me. On the contrary, alot did happen, something comparable to a roller coaster ride. Like immediately after my common tests, i have so much to blog about but i deleted that post. Thought the post was a little too "heavy", you know, with i'm-going-to-flunk-the-papers-badly kind of feeling..

And training resumed almost immediately even though we supposedly have 1 more day of break. Coach's words when i asked him whats the hurry, " You think i'm so kind to let your enjoy ah? Only 3 more weeks left!"
Fine.

Actually i have been thinking whether i should blog about this. As all know, the start of a new school year means new students coming in. For my CCA, we recruited more juniors than i expected. There are quite many of them. Around 11? And lately, we've also been discussing whether we should take part in the A Div Bball Tournament. Eventually, we decided to take part. Here's the problem the seniors face: only 12 are selected for the team to participate in the tournament. *Counting..* We have about 24 on the team. WONDERFUL.

Knowing this, i suddenly want OUT of the whole thing. Its enough that im in a competitive CCA and i HATE competition. Now, i will have to compete with the juniors. And coach have been drilling into our heads that the juniors have great potential blah blah. It just means many of us (seniors) might not get into the team.

Sorry for beating around the bush. Ok, so my point is.
I DONT WANT TO BE REPLACED. By them. We (seniors) were discussing about this, and many of us felt that its pretty unfair if they get to play just after weeks of joining us. BECAUSE, we were really the ones who kind of "held" the team together. Like the "forefathers". haa. We've been training so hard for 1 year plus and, really, we dont want it to go to waste. Some of my team-mates are already contemplating quiting as they felt it would be a waste of time to go training and not be selected in the end. Nvm. I should drop this subject.

There's training tomorrow. I'm not looking forward to it anymore because coach would be using this few days to choose the 12. Not confident at all.

Oh, and I've almost taken back all my common tests papers this week. The results were astonishing!! Very unexpected judging the state i was in when i did my papers. Anyway, it wasnt me, but GOD. I prayed, mum prayed, cyn prayed and He answered. My eyes also popped out when i saw my marks. I just couldnt believe the results i got la. So, i owe it all to GOD! =) Praise Him. I think its the first time He's so real to me, like, He's the one who marked my papers. *Gasp*

I'm so happy................................

Signing off,
Jo

Some pictures i found from the school's website =) Its during the blood donation drive










---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On Thusday, we had a match with the P.E teachers! *WHOA*


I've been looking forward to it all week ever since i knew about it. I never played with teachers before and to my pleasant surprise, this match was organised by them. And its the only chance i can knock them down, or slap their hands, or shove them in the ribs. JUST JOKING.


It was scheduled to start at 5.30pm but, it started raining at 4, and continued till 5. I received a message from my coach that the match is cancelled. I was...so disappointed.


But 10 mins later, he called me to tell me that the rain might stop, and we would wait till 6. In deed, it did stopped. =)


The rain stopped but the court is still very wet so we collected newspapers to dry it. ( We did use the sweeper thingy but newspapers are more efficient.) The teachers were already there when we reached the court. All of them were so...high. High morale and all.



We started work and utilised everyone in the team to help in drying the court and guess what? The teachers didnt even offer to help, they just continued practising. Nevermind.


The match finally started at 6 plus and the whole thing only ended at about 8. Strange, it was supposed to last for 45mins max. Nevermind again.


And the final verdict is... we lose. WELL, surprisingly, they were quite good and we really did our best.


I enjoyed myself. =) Its nice doing something I like.





Signing off,
Joanne (always 17!)

From today onwards, i'm officially a year 2. Gosh.

I was like... pretty stunned. And impressed. I really respect him for that. I mean, he not only has to set aside time for us but also for his studies. Plus, heading a team of girls is simply an uphill task. Even i cannot stand their gigglings and the constant chatter sometimes. As a coach, you cant say things like trainings are cancelled just because you want to go home to watch Yu Le Bai Fen Bai, or that you have an assignment which have be completed. THERE IS GREAT COMMITMENT! *wows and ahs*

Whenever we set our heart to do something, there must be commitment and we make sure we do it. I am one who seriously lacks this. But i am working on it! So GIRLS (you know who you are), when we first set up this blog, there shouldnt only be ME blogging, ALRIGHT?

Signing off,

Joanne (always 17!)

I was allow to blog anything i want.

And this is my first time trying to post something on a blog ! *loud cheerings* I was hoping it could help me to improve my English, because i know PRIS will always correct me if i made any grammatical mistakes. =P

I woke up very early in the morning, around 7.15 (to me, it is VERY early) and it was just so hard to even drag myself across the room. Today is New Year's Eve, i should be enjoying myself, sleeping in and waking up only in the late afternoons, or just stone in front of the TV.

All because i love the game so much. It is New Year's Eve, and we still have basketball training. I had already miss so many sessions before, so even if i'm so tempted to go back to sleep again, i cant do that.

I was actually kind of looking forward to it. Just in case your didnt know, i had to say i really s**k on the court =( Like i am such a slow slow slow learner. But just a few weeks back, a friend very painstakingly taught me how to lay-up the RIGHT way, (which by the way lay-up is the most basic skill). With all the footing, the hand and all.

So today, i was hoping i can apply it properly. Unfortunately, i forgot how, well, not really forgot, but i just cannot get it right. Not only that, I also cant seem to do anything right today. Even simple things like passing!



This made me very frustrated and angry with myself. Suddenly i just felt so disappointed.



And all those thoughts about quiting and giving up kept coming to me. I just felt so useless.
I went home feeling so lousy about myself.