Women Of Destiny

YAY!! test week is over!! all the test are over!! except some lit test next week.. so sian.. i dun like lit!!! rar.. haha. must learn 31 pgs of the play to kill a mocking bird.. do u think i m enjoying it?? NOOO.. haha

i m home liao.. n it is only 12.15 haha 2 day got half day because of good o'level results.. we go to school for some talk and target setting.. den we thot 2day so happy half day den no test but den arh after the principal talk and target setting, there is one time slot for us to do our science test.. 2days test is like the hardest teas of the whole week. after the test we all discussing the anwer i found out i had so so so so so many wrong answers.. zzz.. ARHH!!! after u fail.. zzz..

school goes back to normal 2moro.. means there wud be choir.. AHH!! u noe now choir has PT??!!! we run round the school like 2 rounds on each level n if they see ppl on that level that theynoe, they wud run another round in that level. den after that we did like dunno how many sit ups n push ups.. n we stone in the push up position for like 15 mins!! zzz.. but 2moro is games and we r like probably going to walk to clementi stadium n walk back!! that is like dunno how far away from my school.

YAY!! chinese new year is coming!!! saturday going to eat tuan yuan fan.. CAN EAT STEAM BOAT AGAIN!!! yay..

see jo.. i posted again!! :)
but muz go liao.. muz do hw..
belbel

Dear daughters!!!!!

The sharing I sat in with Zhimin's group is good! I learnt new things. God is SOVEREIGN = God is AUTHORITY! :) Personally I'm reminded by the sermon Ps Eugene shared that indeed this is the year that we see our work moving into our calling as we draw near to God!!! Yeah! Looking forward.

Let's DRAW NEAR TO GOD & find our true REST in & with Him

Reference http://www.fcbc.org.sg/service_news.asp

[FEELING DISJOINTED?]
Can’t seem to bring the same zest after service into the rest of the week? Then what you need is a makeover by God in this Year of Sabbath to integrate your daily life with the spirit life in you! Life will never be the same for you with this daily integration!ITS KEY BENEFITS!
1) Enjoy the inner peace of God when the dividing line between the sacred and the secular vanishes.
2) Embrace a new sense of purpose that God has a plan for me wherever I am.
3) Exult a renewed vigour to explore new ways and possibilities to influence the world I live in for Christ.
Life gets more exciting when everything is integrated. No more daily drudgery!

PRISCILLA: committed to do Psalm with Yingjia everyday
BRENDA: spend more time with GOD, at least 15mins
JANELLE: same as pris, MUST DO PSALM DAILY!!
ANNABEL:spend more time daily on Psalm
JO: must read psalm BEFORE reading the devotion book
ELLYN: spend an hour with God this week to read the Bible
ABIGAIL: set aside time 6am to 6.20am everyday to God
ZHIMIN: wake up at 7am everyday so as to spend more time reading Psalm
CYNTHIA: Make an effort to communicate with brother once a day everyday
MIRIAM: pray to God every night b4 sleeping to help her draw closer to him

*Luv Cynthia

Some pictures i found from the school's website =) Its during the blood donation drive










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On Thusday, we had a match with the P.E teachers! *WHOA*


I've been looking forward to it all week ever since i knew about it. I never played with teachers before and to my pleasant surprise, this match was organised by them. And its the only chance i can knock them down, or slap their hands, or shove them in the ribs. JUST JOKING.


It was scheduled to start at 5.30pm but, it started raining at 4, and continued till 5. I received a message from my coach that the match is cancelled. I was...so disappointed.


But 10 mins later, he called me to tell me that the rain might stop, and we would wait till 6. In deed, it did stopped. =)


The rain stopped but the court is still very wet so we collected newspapers to dry it. ( We did use the sweeper thingy but newspapers are more efficient.) The teachers were already there when we reached the court. All of them were so...high. High morale and all.



We started work and utilised everyone in the team to help in drying the court and guess what? The teachers didnt even offer to help, they just continued practising. Nevermind.


The match finally started at 6 plus and the whole thing only ended at about 8. Strange, it was supposed to last for 45mins max. Nevermind again.


And the final verdict is... we lose. WELL, surprisingly, they were quite good and we really did our best.


I enjoyed myself. =) Its nice doing something I like.





Signing off,
Joanne (always 17!)

Our school have been having this Project Agape for the past few days. It is a project initiated by our students to help with the limited supply of blood in the blood bank. 2 doctors came down from NUH to help us. Apparently, they were expecting a big crowd. But, there were only 75 bags of blood...and 20 plus people were turned down because of various reasons, low blood count etc.

Dear daughters!!!!!

How can we always live in God's Presence? But the question is do u want to always be in the Presence of God? If you wish to be close & near to God, apply the applications :) It's God's way of say "Draw near to Me & I'll draw near to you" ~ James 4:8 Don't be lazy okies! Press on!!! :P
(thks Bel Bel for compiling)

Miriam- serve brother with her actions, not to order her bro around
Annabel- Honour her mum by actions
Brenda- to keep her oath. especially reading the psalms
Jo- Keep oath, keep promises to other ppl
Cherish- read psalms b4 breakfast everyday
Ellyn- continue to read psalms everyday esp on weekends. Tink b4 speaking so as not to hurt someone
Zhimin- think b4 speaking
Cynthia- appreciate 1 person a day
Abigail- try not to break promises, and try to organise her time, so that she has more time to spend with God, do a reminder in hp
Chloe- must read psalm a day, keep forgetting
Anndrea- do not take advantage /gossip abt ppl

Luv Cynthia

Clearly, i'm so not so much of an articulate speaker. Either that or the hairdresser wasnt listening to me.

Yesterday, i finally decided to cut my hair since its really bothering me, and i cant even see properly when i'm playing basketball. PLUS, the weather is so hot and humid this past few days. Afraid that the prices would jack up even more within this week, I found my way to this salon near my house (recommended by my mum). The nice lady handed me a magazine on hairstyle, and i took it over to see if there's any pictures that would help in the explaining of my ideal hairstyle to whoever that is cutting my hair.

"How can i help you?" This young man came over. I pointed at the picture and as crystal-clear as i can, told him what i wanted ( i had enough of BAD HAIR CUTS) and at some point, even emphasizing on the "not so SHORT" or the "not too layered" parts.

Just to be safe, i uttered a short prayer quietly.

Finally assured that he understood what i want, i took off my glasses and went into a state of relaxation. NOTE: This is probably why the whole thing went wrong. I cant see without my glasses.

After some time, he was done. I put my specs on and i really do NOT like what i saw in the mirror. WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM?! Really, i could have fainted on the spot. Before i could do anything disastrous to that man, i made my payment and get out of that shop. Once out, i made a good point to turn around and made sure i remembered that salon because i'm never even going to set foot in there again.

Promised myself once i have the time, I'm going to make contact lens.

Anyway, i found this funny joke on some blog.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.

" Hello ? Is your daddy home?" he asked.

" Yes ," whispered the small voice.

"May I talk to him?"

The child whispered, " No ."

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"

" Yes ."

"May I talk to her?" Again the small voice whispered, " No ."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?"

" Yes ," whispered the child, " a policeman ."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak to the policeman?"

" No, he's busy , " whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman ," came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A helicopter." answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again, whispering, the child answered, " The search team just landed a helicopter."

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle..." ME ."

Signing off,
Joanne (always 17!)

HELLO PEOPLE!!
this is the newsletter for this week.. ENJOY!! :)
-on behalf of cynthia-

Dear daughters, (esp here!!!)

Our second newsletter of the year! Thks bel bel for compiling. This time all your applications came rather late but I hope u've already begin applying what God has spoken to you :)

ELLYN: talk to God when im doing Psalm , but also remember God and talk to him when im free or wadsoever
JOANNE: work hard to God's heart by not taking the easy way out, cos sometimes it is the hard way that God wants us to take tolerant or to gain something from it
ANNDREA: spend ten min everyday to meditate on the psalm passage
JANELLE: continue to read pslams everyday n spend time wif God
ZHIMIN: be more gentle in word
ANNABEL: read thru psalm properly n not rush thru.. though that means waking up earlier
PRISCILLA:do psalm wif yingjia everyday
LI SAN:read the daily psalm as per schedule n enquire if truly dont understand
BRENDA: try to seperate from the world by not spending time the way i'll want to n shall spend more time on qt n work
CYNTHIA: Take more time to absorb & understand the Psalm instead of jumping rite into the devotional guide book

CYNTHIA
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ok no more.. by the way.. HAPPY BELATED BDAY TO CYN N BRENDA... lol..

belbel

Yesterday, our vice principal threw us some questions.

"What have you done for the last 8 weeks? To this, the last 8 weeks meant the holidays which were just over.

Next, "What will you do in the next 8 months?"

"Where will you be in 8 years time?"

I didnt attempt to answer the questions because i wanted to see what he had to say to us. Erm, more like I just didnt feel like answering them, because 1) I did not revise my work in the holidays except completing the homework given, 2) What else can i do except to mug and mug and mug, 3) This is the toughest question, as i had absolutely no clue where to start with.

And this is what my vice principal had to say, " What you did or did not do for the past 8 weeks will affect your next 8 months..."

!!!

He went on, " and what you do or do not in the next 8 months will affect where you will be in the next 8 years."

Oh my gosh, i practically broke out in cold sweat. The way he put it is so scary, yet motivating. I mean the past 8 weeks is already over, and there's nothing i can do about it. Except to chiong like mad till my A's are over.

" No sacrifices, no victory."- Quoted from Transformers. Lesser Yu Le Bai Fen Bai time. Lesser Playtime. The time we have left to study is inversely proportionate to the time we use to play. Dont that make sense?

And he also went through with us some skills and habits that we ought to have, which i feel is also very applicable to you girls.

1. Be portable - Bring your notes everywhere, so that no time is wasted between journeys of travelling. DO SOMETHING ANYTIME ANYWHERE.
2. Do hateful stuff first - We cant always choose to do what we like but we can always choose to like what we do.
3. Review your work after it's marked.
4. Know what is expected of you.
5. Participate actively in class - We learn only if we are involved.
6. Be aware of your own learning style - This is the most important thing, I am still trying to figure out which is mine. Best time? Best place? how do you study best?
7. Get your teachers on your side - I'm not asking you to suck up to your teachers...just maybe be nice, help them with their books and stuff, haa
8. BUILD FRIENDSHIPS, NOT RELATIONSHIPS.

Ok, that's it. The list is inexhuastive. I'm off to hit the books now. Ciao.

Signing off,
Joanne (always 17!)

Reference from cluster blog http://ethnosemmanuel.wordpress.com/

Dear Cluster! For this Season of Intimacy, our cluster pastors have marked out a day in the month for our Ethnos Emmanuel WORD Encounter. This is from Jan to June and we are coming together as a Cluster to spend time hearing His words and reading His words.The first Word Encounter will start next Friday Jan 18. Venue: TCT Block 162 Room 4L, 5pm to 10pm
Please inform your cell brothers, sisters and members and bring them there. Cell leaders may ask your members to come for the Word Encounter in lieu of your usual cell meetings.

Where?
Venue for Jan 18 and Feb 15 is confirmed at BLK 162 Level 4 Room 4L

When? (all dates on Fridays)
Jan 18
Feb 15
Mar (replaced by Sanctification Weekend)
Apr 18
May 30 (May’s date is later as there are exams and Youthnet 144 Re-Encounter)
June 20

Time for each Word Encounter is 5pm to 10pm.

How (will it work)?
The room will be available from 5pm to 10pm. The audio bible will be played between 5pm to 10pm. Each of you can bring your cell at anytime between 5pm to 10pm to spend time listening to the Word and encountering God. So, its really OTOT (own time own target) Eg. The cell can meet for dinner and then proceed to the room to spend an hour reading the Bible or listening to the Bible. OR for those with work commitments, your youth can spend time in the room before meeting you for dinner as you come from work.Simple? Definitely! Come this year of Sabbath, let us draw close in intimacy with God!

Blog IC. Philip. (on behalf of our dear Pastor Serene) =D

Today is someone's brithday. I was reminded of the first time i met her in my secondary school.

It was during the first meeting of Girls' Brigade. I was Sec 1 and she's 23 ( correct me if i'm wrong). There were many officers there too, like Penny, Liyan, Liping etc. The first meeting was fun ( of course, if not i wouldnt have stayed. haha) and i remembered i had no difficulty talking to the new people. I was still VERY young ma...

Then, i saw her. I was like "How come this girl who only look like she's a few years older than us is one of our officers? I think i asked Penny about this too but i forgot what she said. We were having this mini refreshment at the back of the classroom so i walked to where she is and asked her "Are you 15?"

And she kept laughing. Probably out of joy because i had asked a 23 year old if she's 15.

After that meeting, i guess we grew to know each other better. Also, i happened to be in her squad. But i would always ask if i am allow to be in Penny's squad instead, because during that period of time when i was still in GB, she was our drill captain. VERY FIERCE. We would be standing under the hot sun, trying to carry out every command flawlessly. All of us always complain and grumble after each session.

There was one time when we were punished and had to do hundred squats (forgot why we were punished) and she did it with us. And another time, we had long wooden rulers tied to our arms so that our hands would be straight when we march. Such grueling and hard sessions..

After that i went to church with the Officers, (oh i used to call them by "Officer Penny, Officer Cynthia"), and i began to go regularly, and i became Cynthia's cell group member. Even then, i still asked if i can be transferred to Penny's cell group and Cynthia always said no. haha.

Now, I'm just glad to be in her cell group. Because after knowing her for about 5 years ( this is the 6th?), she really is a wonderful person and a patient mother.

God's arrangement rock! *whohoo*

Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, CYNTHIA!

Signing off,
Joanne (always 17!)

HELLO PPL!!
here is the newsletter 4 this sunday..

The Year of Sabbath is here! Sabbath does not mean not doing anything & sleeping our day away. *horrors* Sabbath is DELIBERATELY entering God's rest for us! And the deliberation we're doing now is to read One Psalms A Day. Is that not something you are used to doing! Then this is the time to DELIBERATELY enter God's rest, promises, assurance for us (first thing in the morning) by reading His Word; by spending time in His Presence. Indeed what a great privilege it is to come into the Presence of the Living God - the Maker of Heaven & Earth. Thank You Lord! We love You too! *Hugs*
Brenda: Constantly pray/talk to God not just during QT
Annabel: Trust that God put me in the right class
Janelle: Walk with God everyday (a Psalm a day) attend SOL classes
Joanne: Trusting God in His Plans for me
Priscilla: a Pslam a day IN THE MORNING & attend SOL classesAnndrea: Read Pslam and attend SOL classes
ZM: Wake up earlier to read Psalms by breakfast, attend LOS again
Ellyn: Wake up earlier to read Psalms by breakfast
Miriam: Wake up earlier to read Psalms by breakfast
Cynthia: Remember to say thank you to God for blessing me to enter His Presence each morn rather than getting things out of God thru that time.
ok.. end of newsletter..
anyway.. REMINDER!! pls remember to write ur testimonies n send it to joanne by e-mail by friday..

belbel

We had training today! =) Like every other sessions, i got reprimanded by my coaches. Quite alot. But that's ok, i'm pretty used to it. I have to be teachable in order to improve. Haa.

Just 2 days ago, I received an sms from my coach that we will be playing a friendly against Clementi Town Sec. SECONDARY SCHOOL. Can you imagine our individual skills and standard..? Well, the team is still quite new and only a few of us had some experience.

Anyway, we were suppose to be celebrating our 2 coaches' birthday, since they lie around January so we decided to celebrate for them together. The girls put in alot of effort such that they wanted to give them a surprise, by starting first with some shocking arguments among themselves, storm off the court angrily, then come back with a cake. 2 cakes actually. They even prepared 2 balloons with messages on them.

Only the supposedly "shocking arguments" never came, we were all too gigglish to even start one. Everyone was so frantically trying to think up something, other than quarreling. NOTE: We were all doing drills and planning at the same time, so my coach is like pretty frustrated when he caught us talking in our small groups.

Finally, we just took out the cake, light the candle and walked towards the court where he is coaching the new Year 1s. Another NOTE: There were many people at the court, because the boys bball team at a trial selection today, also with the hockey team behind, and the tennis people not far from us.

And we started singing the happy birthday song. This caught the attention of almost everyone at the court.

ONLY, the 2 coaches TOTALLY ignore us. The first one just turned around and looked at us, " Go to the side please, give them space to do lay-ups." The second one came, hang around for awhile, and he went dribbling off.

But 2nd wasnt too bad, AT LEAST HE BLEW THE CANDLE and made a wish when we asked him to. ( His wish: That we would win every match)

The 1st? "Have you finish your break? Not long enough is it?"

GOSH!! WHAT A GRATEFUL BRAT! We really should apologise for celebrating his birthday for him.

And we continued with our training. Like a group of girls holding on to 2 cakes, singing birthday song and having everyone staring at us (probably in disbelief and maybe, awe, because the birthday boys just ignored us, and we kept singing, as though to ourselves) haven just happened.

Many of us were so angry! Its obvious they didnt appreciate us at all... Well well well, we have taken in some new year 1s, dont think he need us anymore. My friend said he might be allowing the year 1s to play in our upcoming match.

All of us have trained for 1 years plus plus plus, and now we are being replaced so fast.

I totally felt like crying throughtout the whole training. =(

Signing off,
Joanne (always 17!)

When I hear someone comment that being a mother and homemaker is boring, I have a simple response: You’re right!

The truth is, almost any occupation – telephone operator, pathologist, lawyer or dentist – requires long hours of tedious activity. Few of us enjoy heart-thumping excitement every moment of our professional lives.

I once stayed in a hotel room next to the room of a famous cellist who was performing in a classical concert that evening.

I could hear him through the walls as he practiced for hours. He didn’t play beautiful symphonic renditions – he repeated scales and exercise, over and over. He began early in the morning and continued until it was time to go on stage.

As he stepped onto the stage that night, I’m sure many in the audience thought to themselves:” What a glamorous life he must lead!”

Some glamour! I happen to know how he had spent the entire day in his lonely hotel room with his cello.

I doubt that being a mother and homemaker is more boring than most other jobs. As for the importance of the assignment, I believe that no job can compete with the satisfaction of moulding & guiding a child.
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Cynthia: Do you like what you're doing (E.g. working, attending CCAs, studying, Basketball training, reading Psalms, attend cell group, go SOL etc etc)? Yes/No/Not Really? If No/Not Really.... Do you then know why you're still doing what you're doing? WITH THE END IN MIND, things could sometimes be much clearer & makes more sense.
Studying - Teaching us to use our brains & equipping us with knowledge
Working - To earn a living & provide for our families & a kick start in our career life
All things related to church - To help us know God & develop a real relationship with Him. Knowing how much He loves us & the destiny He has in mind for us!

Luv Cynthia

I noticed that about your message so i never read them, haha.

Very happy that you are in the best class, Bel. No matter how boring or dead your classmates are or whatever class that you are in, you should still concentrate on your studies. Hmmm, if you are still in Sec 1, i would suggest to you: play! =)

However, that does not mean you cant continue playing when you are in Sec 2. You can, but remember to clear your doubts and any topics which you dont understand with your teachers. ITS VERY IMPORTANT!

That year, that i was in Sec 2, was my most memorable and happiest period of my life. So far. My friends and i were a total havoc. Anyway, i did study when it comes to exams and didnt end up in a class that was too bad. =) Just that i really regret i didnt set my foundations too well when i was in sec 3 and suffered quite alot when its comes to O levels. Nevermind that now.

I had bball training today! Realised how much i talked about bball-related stuff whenever i blog. Surprisely, very very unlike any other normal days, i was totally psyched up about the training. About 15 mins into the session, there was slight drizzling. We continued, thinking it will go away. Then, rain started to pour.

BUMMER! We totally had to stop. No excuse not to, because our school compound is VERY lightning-proned. We went to the canteen where all the pull-up bars are and did assisted pull-ups. I cant even pull myself up even with the help.

Training ended early at 6 and i went off to meet Louisa, Yong Xin and Wendi at Orchard. ( Just some introduction: They are my secondary school mates, we are very very close friends.)

We were walking when suddenly i had this crazy thought of going for a plastic surgery. It is so common in Korea that girls are getting insured so that when they reach the age of 18, they would have the money to go under the knife. I mean who wouldnt want to look wonderful? Of course, i definitely wouldnt not go for it, its just a passing thought. But being brought up in such a cruel and visual society, it is not hard to notice that the society values the beautiful looking people much more than the average looking ones. Its upsetting but that's true. Even we, ourselves, judge people by their appearances faster than they talk. It is also scientifically proven that the better looking people are more successful in life than others - http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/7420983/, which i think is not very reliable..

God made us and in His eyes, we are BEAUTIFUL as who we are, and that we should not change it to what we ourselves think is better looking. It is not always about looks. You cant have a pretty shell but NOTHING inside right? Like the old old old saying which can never be wrong, inner beauty is still the best and it last forever! It brings out the beauty in YOU.

Alright! I'm very glad to see that Annabel have heeded my commitment advise and started to blog. WHAT ABOUT THE OTHERS?

Signing off,

Joanne (always 17!)

HELLO PPL!!
i have since been asked to post.. 1stly.. JOANNE U RAWK!!! haha.. so many many posts!! okok... i stop disturbing u..
school has started.. zzz.. so sian.. i now in best class.. the ppl there so different from my previous classes.. they so quiet n guai!! sometimes in class also they so boring one.. this class is actually quite boring.. RAR!! no excitement. anyway.. many of them were from the 1st class last yr.. so most of them noe each other.. den there are aome of us who were from the average classes laat yr.. u noe all those ppl from the 1st class like dun mix wif us de.. so all the ppl from average classes which is about 6 of us stick 2gether..i m actually quite sian in the class.. RAR!! the teachers also.. we got all the good teachers.. i guess that is sort of a good thing but the teachers so fierce!! n being in the 1st class, teachers expect u to noe everything in the world n participate in everything... okok.. maybe i m making it sound so super bad.. okok i encourage u all!! those who r in or r aiming 2 go into 1st class, Work HARD!!! dun dun want to go juz because of wad i told u all.. ur school may be different.. u wud neva noe.. :).
oh ya.. there is cell 2moro.. u all will be recieving a message from me.. if u all dun notice is always the same message juz that sometimes i change some parts.. haha.. i stored it my drafts.. go n observe.. haha..
CYNTHIA!! i posted!! :)

ok.. i need to go my mum's cell group liao..
bye!!
BEL BEL..

From today onwards, i'm officially a year 2. Gosh.

I was like... pretty stunned. And impressed. I really respect him for that. I mean, he not only has to set aside time for us but also for his studies. Plus, heading a team of girls is simply an uphill task. Even i cannot stand their gigglings and the constant chatter sometimes. As a coach, you cant say things like trainings are cancelled just because you want to go home to watch Yu Le Bai Fen Bai, or that you have an assignment which have be completed. THERE IS GREAT COMMITMENT! *wows and ahs*

Whenever we set our heart to do something, there must be commitment and we make sure we do it. I am one who seriously lacks this. But i am working on it! So GIRLS (you know who you are), when we first set up this blog, there shouldnt only be ME blogging, ALRIGHT?

Signing off,

Joanne (always 17!)

Its me again. I think i'm starting to love doing this blog thing =D

School is starting tomorrow. I can already picture myself dragging myself up each EARLY EARLY morning, ringing up teachers for consultations, dark rings circling my eyes, endless tutorials and lecture notes to study up and trying to catch up with my classmates. *SIGH* Oh, this year is the A levels year too. *GROANS AND MOANS* Only one thing is looking up. I went back to school the other day and i notice there are new stall vendors! foooood!

I think i'm having one of those first-day-of-school-anxiety symptoms. Yes, i've been through this every new year. But the previous year and this year is a bit different. No. Very different. Ever since i got into this school, it just felt so difficult to even go to school and face my classmates. And yes, it has been a year now, but i'm still adapting, especially to the people around me.

My wonderful classmates always ask me out, i would always turn down their offer or make up some lame excuses that i would not be free ( i hope none of them read this). I mean, i'm ok with being with them, but i can't stand being with them even outside school. Not that they are mean or what, they are great. The problem just lies with me. Sometimes, it is just harder to find friends we are comfortable with. Especially godly friends. So for some of us, let's not give up.

I've have always felt there is something wrong with me. The older i am, the harder is it for me to make friends. I mean, seriously, some of them are still doing fine. A friend told me " Put me in somewhere new and i'll know at least half the people in there before the day end" when i asked her for advice. I really envy her. Whenever, i meet new people (especially people my age), i thought i can feel them scrutinizing me, like how i wear, how i behave etc etc. I would rather not go near them.



It was really hard for me to accept the fact that i got into this school. All my good friends are in another place. I believed that God put me there a reason. For the first few months, i can feel myself clinging on to God. Tightly. I would pray before i go to school. That everything would go well, that i wouldnt embarrass myself, that there would be lesser notes so that i can have time to revise them. And i can feel myself growing closer to Him.



Unknowingly, i start to really despise going to school. So much so that even passing by that MRT station would make me nausea. haa. Finally, the year ended and I was so happy. But not for long la. Oh, and i slacked so much during this holiday. Supposed to be revising.


Recently, during a sermon, Pastor Khong ( i forgot who) said something like, God will change, not by doing away with going to school, but by changing us, e.g love school. I decided to start this year LOVING it for a change. It'll be hard, but God will help.





Really, i should be sleeping now.

Signing off,
Joanne ( always 17!)