I am dying
I AM DYING.....
It's not too far to say that when you are hopeless, in despair, depressed.... Hopelessness Kills.
Quoting something which a wonderful friend smsed me:
"If we come to think or feel that we have nothing to hope for and can only expect things to get worse in the future, invevitably we grow depressed and to a certain degree, desperate... We may try to hide our condition, but the unfocused rage, fury and hatred of life that we feel, work like acid....dissolving all other feelings into purest bitterness.
Hopelessness is at the root of many of today's psychological disorders.... Our sense of self worth dissolves into self doubt, self-distrust and self-dislike; confidence is swallowed up in despair. (J.I.Packer)"
How scary. Hopelessness kills one softly... if you allow it. But I found a cure for it. H*O*P*E. Hope it perks you up again as it did me :)
What a Friend We Have In Jesus
What a friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear.
What a privilege to carry, everything to God in prayer.
Oh, what peace we often forfeit. Oh, what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry, Everything to God in prayer.
Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
When we come to the end of ourselves....perhaps that's truly when God can begin a NEW work in us.
John 12:24-26 I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
Luv Cynthia
My visit to SGH II
I went back today immediately before my GP lesson starts.
And i met an Angel today on the bus journey there. Actually i was very unsure where to alight, so i was looking around for an obvious sign of the building. Again, i was so sian having to stay alert, i decided to ask the auntie beside me.
Me: *tap tap* Do you know where is SGH?
Auntie: All the way to the interchange, then you can take shuttle bus then you can alight along one of the many stops...
Me: *speechless* How do you know?
Auntie: Im going there too.
...Ya. On both ocassions, i had someone to follow to get to the place =)
Anyway, my uncle had already completed his scope test for checking of his lungs and was resting. And he is looking so much better than yesterday!
Though, i must comment, the hospital is soooooo inefficient. The test was done only after so many days that he was warded.
ok! that's all for today! My math revisions are calling for me...........
Signing off and still praying hard,
Jo
My visit to SGH
On the train to Outram, i was wondering out loud to Anna whether i should visit my uncle. I was afraid that there would be awkwardness once we exhausted our conversation.
But i decided to go anyway, if there's really nothing to talk about, i'll just leave, saying i have school tomorrow. I guess i'm just afraid of silence.
Dont get me wrong; i really wanted to pay him a visit. He is one of my favourite uncle after all, affectionately known to us as 姑丈. I know him as a very healthy person, occasionally swimming laps in the swimming pool in his residential area. Hearing that he was admitted into the hospital naturally shocked me. My parents was preparing to visit him this morning, since i cant join them, i decided to go after church.
I alighted at Outram, unsure of which direction to go once i tapped my card. I remembered some pretty vague directions from my mum, "very easy one, just cross the bridge", echoed by Anna's voice "just cross the bridge, can see already". So without really looking at the signs, i exit from the station....and couldnt see any obvious bridge. I ended up walking one big round back into the station again and this time i followed the signs faithfully. Finally i got out, and was pretty much lost again.
Sick and tired of groping my way around, i decided to approach some friendly looking tamil ladies.
Me: "S'cuse me, where is SGH?"
Auntie: There. *pointing to the big building in front of me*
Me: oh....
Auntie: "Which block are you going?"
Me: ahh...*checking my phone* block 4
Auntie: Me too, follow me.
I followed her, while thinking to myself that its God's angels. Ha Ha.
Finally, i was outside my uncle's ward. I looked in and searched for that face that always seems to brighten me up.
However, today i didnt brighten upon seeing him. He was resting, eyes closed, propped up right against his pillow, with his ipod plugged in, a bible by his side. I walked slowly towards him, suddenly feeling so..ache-y, i meant my heart.
He woke up when i touched his hand softly. The minute he opened his eyes and looked at me, i totally burst out crying, in between, trying to force out some sentences. Im ok, he assured me firmly.
But he dont looked like it, he was so frail and tired looking! After i calmed down, we talked. And the conversation just flow, and i enjoyed every minute with him. Yes, there were moment of silent but it was never due to awkwardness, we were just thinking.
I told him everything; my school, my friends, my cell, my annoying brothers etc. He listened. He told me his work, his church, and those people who visited him. I listened. My eyes drifted to the places where the needles was poked in, and it went red again.
I did what normally people do when they visit people in hospital. Cleaned some blueberries and strawberries and both of us ate them and he let me listened to his ipod, let me drink this bottle of promengranate juice that someone bought him, and i even ate his dinner! Before you get critical with me, my uncle just dont want to eat rice. And he was waiting for my aunt to bring food. So i eat lor... i know la, im a 贪吃鬼.
Suddenly, he started coughing mid conversation with someone from his church. I was starting to feaked out when he didnt stop and even coughed out blood. Many blood. The doctor was called in to examine him and i walked out the ward, crying again.
When the doctor was done, i went in. (His friend left, sending his regards and telling me he would pray.) I cried even harder (I really felt like slapping myself), when i went in again. He looked worse! Gosh, i felt so helpless.
After what seemed like forever, my aunt came, she hurried to my uncle's side, bending over to hear him. Then, she came over to me and hugged me, perhaps, she noticed my stupidly reddened eyes. She told me uncle also quite scared
himself.. =(
Then, my cousin sent me home. It was getting quite late.
I think i'm going to skip that useless GP lesson and visit him tomorrow.
---
My uncle is a man with strong faith in God. I believe he will be fine. He kept telling me only God can do something about it. He was also telling me, how when you "sow" love, you "reap" love.
Signing off and praying hard,
Jo
Hillsong - This is our God
Won't it be great if we have more healthy, clean, godly content on the Internet :)
*I will be buying the album soon! yea!*
Date Rape (Part II)
After reading my post on date rape my wonderful malaysian joker (fren) shocked me with the update that there is worse drugs out there. They don't even spike your drink, just paste a celotape drug (think something like hansaplast) & you're GONE!!!!
But the latest news I've heard as an ex-raver and shuffler, is that there have been incidences of date rapes using this drug known as Scopolamine. Rohypnol is usually a small pill or powder or something foreign that's dumped into your drink.
So why is Scopolamine scary?
It's a drug in the form of a transdermal patch. Which means epidermical transfer. Which means the drug comes in the form of some small kinda celotape, they walk by you, brush your arm or something (whilst conveniently sticking the drug on your arm), and next thing you know, you wake up not knowing anything.
All date rape drugs induce anterograde amnesia, which is a cricitcal factor in date rapes because you wake up not having the foggiest idea of what happened. Scopolamine is scary because it's so hard to spot, usually a laced celotape or something. Rohypnol or other Benzo's are easier to spot because they come in pills or powders.
A friend of mine over msn just commented that the drug would take time to settle in. I agree. This makes Scopolamines all the more dangerous, because you would meet more people whilst waiting for the drug to settle in. Which means you'll be less likely to remember who your assailant was. o.O
So when you think clubbing or raving is cool and all that, make sure you know and understand and keep a look out for impending dangers. I've been in countless of situations where I've had to go and bail friends outta trouble because they were targets of psychos and perverts. One of the best things you can have is someone 113% reliable to count on. Especially in these cases.
But let me push this point further by saying abstain from clubbing. Save yourself the trouble (and others). Sure, an experience is an experience. But to be hooked onto the scene? You gotta be flogging me. There's so much I could say here, but the point is that... is it worth the danger you could possibly be getting into?
There's hundreds of scenarios. Fights, rapes, drugs, molest, filming, stalking, murder, robbery, etc. Even with the most reliable person on earth, you can still get into trouble. Especially when it comes hunting for you. Sure it's a big challenge, but only real people, with real fighting spirits will stand up for principles.
Who else know your panties colour?
I thought this is a wonderful post from EJ. Hey girls enough of me telling you all the time about short skirts and stuff....Hear it from a man himself!
A month ago, I had a rather traumatizing encounter while shopping at a shopping mall. This incident happened while I was traveling up on the escalator. Sited ahead of me, next to the step out point from the escalator, there was a shop brandished with perfumes and cosmetic products. What shocked me at that particular point was that one of the salesgirl, back facing the store entrance and wearing a mini flair skirt, was climbing up on a ladder and stocking up products in the cabinet. She was totally oblivious to the fact that in that position, she was going to almost let everyone around have a free upskirt show!
It didn't need to take supersonic senses for me to understand what was coming next if I were to continue staring for another 10 seconds. Instantaneously as this salesgirl started her climb up the ladder, I immediately turned my eyes away to look elsewhere. Phew! A huge sigh of relief.... (I will explain my point later in this post. Read on.)
Traumatized enough, I wasn't prepare to stay around to spot the "Ti-Ko-Pek"s whom may be drooling at this free view nor see if there were anyone whom would go and get this salesgirl down from the ladder. I zipped off to the next level and carried on with my shopping.
Gosh! What has happened to the dressing culture of the teenage girls of today? Aren't they worried of over (or indecent) exposure when they wear such short flair kind of skirts? Honestly, I have nothing against girls wearing skirt, but I just feel strongly that there's got to be a limit to how far this can go. There has been enough horror stories of molest cases and people using handphone cameras to capture upskirt pictures. I seriously think girls can go one step further to protect themselves by giving their mini-skirts a bit more cloth-lengthening.
To the Girls: Yes, you do have the free-will to wear anything you like. Yes, guys should learn to be more self-controlled and not have wandering eyes. But the truth is that you will do yourselves and the guys a huge favor by re-considering your approach the next time you want to wear those short skirts. You can take active measures to protect yourselves. Example: If you are wearing those mini-skirts, do use you handbags to block or get a friend to stand behind you while you travel up the escalators. and for goodness sake, girls please do not climb ladders when you are wearing skirts. I am sure there are plenty of gentlemen around whom can lend their muscles to help you. Honestly, we guys are all visually stimulated, that slight upskirt/buttline/over-fleshy exposure will trigger a lot of reaction through our mind.
Having said this, Girls, you do not need to wrap yourselves up like a dumpling. Either opt for longer length skirts or learn to take proper preventive measures. I am certain beauty and proper cover up can co-exist.
To the Guys: Now, be truthful and do not just bluntly shift all the blames to the girls. Let's also learn to exercise self-control and respect the ladies. Be alert at ALL times! And learn to turn your eyes away when you expect some of these exposure may come. If you have a girlfriend, learn to share this with your girlfriend and ask her to help give you warning signals! And sometimes if by accident you do catch a glimpse, just turn away and walk off. DO NOT allow yourself to be glued! Some of you may say, "Wah.. but free show mah, why don't see? Anyway it's not harmful mah!" WRONG! Honestly, how is staring at upskirts of ladies different from watching pornography???? The end results and effects are the same - our values and moral standards towards sexuality becomes eroded! And some may end up becoming perverts whom take upskirt photos as their secret obsession!
So guys, be alert and stay clear!!!
**************************************************
Extremely Concerned Cynthia: Okies I shall come up with my gals version soon :)
My Love Story (The Malaysian Version)
Sharing with everyone this special post written by a dear friend of mine.
Disclaimer: Please read with discretion! =) Stay tuned to my blog for the true blue Singapore version of the story.
So sit tight and enjoy this story.....
So yes, this is the story of a "couple" of my friends. And how the met. And how friendship blossomed into a tree bearing much fruit. Before I go on, I must admit, I have to preconceived idea that Singaporean girls generally are more aggressive compared to Malaysian girls. And I still do think so.
On one of the days during the trip, I asked my new found friend called C, how her relationship with my other new found friend called E happened. She proceeded to produce a a little story slightly south of the truth. When I asked E, a differing story came up. And when I asked the rest of my newly found friends, even more disparities were produced. So I guess I shall hope off the bandwagon and merge my little puzzle here.
I managed to find some cute and archived pictures from this blogger, very creative I must say. Anyways, I'll be using some of her material as part of this story. So all credit goes to her for pictures. =)
Anyways, the story goes like this...
For a long, long, long, while, our friend C has been waiting for a burning ember to spark up her life. But like the saying goes... it's hard to hit a moving target.
So they became friends on a mission trip. Wahseh, holy fate + destiny + galaxy colliding + etc etc + please_insert_own_ideas_here. But this is where it gets interesting. C says, that she thinks E is too friendly.
There's such a thing? O.o
And before E can do anything, he's already pwned by the force of a woman's mind. Because in a woman's head... friendly = player.
Everyone say: First Blood!
But yes, E is friendly and warm. So when C sees this, she panics and puts out the fire before there is even a hint of smoke. Yet, she cannot help but already be captured by his presence and charm...
And from there, C begins to allow E to win her heart. Awwww.
But for that to happen. One of the following must arise...
Nevertheless, as E arised to win C's heart, he embarks on a quest so fearless that it requires him to have faith and the heart of a lion. After all, to win a girls' heart is no easy feat. It requires someone like the above four pictures to rise up deep within. Haha. But the truth is, Someone even better must arise first.
And so E prepares himself. And when the opportunity arose, mathematical formula proved true.
Opportunity + Preparation = Destiny ready to be taken hold of!
"And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken."
Ecclesiastes 4:12
So, to E and C. May you both be blessed on this journey. And may I be invited to your wedding day. Hopefully not to present this blogpost. Hahaha.
You're both wonderful rolemodels and mentors to a generation in desperate need of guides in faith, hope and love. And as you both look to our King, may you both radiate with his presence and grace. And above all, may you both radiate with, and in, His love. As we fight for the future, I continue to hope in standing by your sides, fighting for the Cause and for life. With God, less is indeed more.
"What the world needs now, more than ever before, are every day heroes who are ready, willing and able to make a difference." -
Greg Hickman
what they would do
shh. don't tell my dad i'm here.
but i felt such an urge to tell some really funny stories about certain chaps that just make me crack up so much. one would be wall-e. did you watch the movie? he was so sweet! maybe i should start calling myself eve XD. *snow starts to fall* oh and one more thing.
my sisters are really attractive. the 2nd one, 16, apparently received very special attention. she was walking when a rather cute ah beng passed her a note.
"when i saw you, i nearly died, because i couldn't breath. 9*******(his number)"
HAHA. she threw it away, shockingly. poor dude. i think he was so breathless he forgot his 'e'. i think that'll be my newest pick-up line. i'll tell it to the nearest pretty girl i see in church tommorrow and i'll tell you what happened. hah.
then the other 19 year old. she had 2 china guys wanting her number and she ran away. haha.
then the best was this. she wanted to get a food coupon and they had to fill in their name or something.
guy at counter: oh, no need to fill in your name, just fill in your number.
my sister: oh, ok. (really believes him and does it)
her friend later: huh, we just filled in our names and nothing else. no need for numbers.
sheesh. what people will do for your number.
but the best was my father. my mother complained that when he was courting her he would call her and ask about algebra questions even though his math was better than hers. haha.
what guys would do for a girl. i really must try it and scare a friend next time.
love,
brenda
p.s it's a joke, relax if you're not annabel XD
Feel the Power!
Are you looking for BREAKTHROUGHS in your life??? Look no further!!! Invite a friend to TCT this Saturday! :)
6th September, 3-5pm